My father would date our menstrual cycle. All 6 of us. He wanted to know when we prayed and if anything were to go wrong with our cycle.
~My mother
Hello Hameedah, we lost him. Those were the exact words of my mother some 7 weeks and 5 days ago. It was a elder brother she referred to. My uncle had just passed on.
Prior to his passing, he was fine until a day before when he had a stroke and that was it. His soul gently stepped out of his body like a queen steps out a limo. Slow and steady.
She hung up immediately and I knew what I was supposed to do. I got dressed and headed for my cousins house.
Tears rolled down my cheek as I got into the house, looking at every corner and seeing familiar and old faces slowly shedding tears as if to say they were scared of crying. Yes, they were.
In my religion, we don’t wail for the dead. We pray; speak softly and repeat again and again till we can no longer feel the pain which hardly ever happens. We just get used to it.
My saliva tasted bitter as I saw the look in my mother’s eyes. She was hurt.
Hurt that he died, hurt that their last encounter was an argument, hurt that he had left before their father of 103 years. They could never break this news to him. Never!
Family members began to narrate dreams they had in the past few weeks and how it all makes sense now. How they had “seen it coming”, how they had been sent a sign.
It was such a huge loss as my mothers older ones cried. Sometimes in low tones and other times uncontrollable outbursts too. It was too much pain for them to process.
As I lowered my backside into Daddy’s chair on the dinning table, I had a rush of memories from when we were kids. He was such a man that when I thought of discipline, a picture of his gentle eyes and firm but melanin glowing skin comes to mind. Daddy was real caramel dipped in chocolate.
He was the most organised person I had met, at least apart from his 103 year old father. It was a spectacular trait that quite a number of us had in the family. I have it too.
My sisters and cousin called from various countries and my cousin who was his only son prayed for his father over a video call as the congregation said prayers and choruses amen to his prayers too. He wished he was home to see the remains of his father. He also had a dream. Sigh!
I still remember the burst of tears I tried hiding till I saw my favorite cousin; mistura. The pain in her eyes were immeasurable. It pierced into my heart like a needle piercing a nylon water and drip, drop, the tears started to flow. We hugged.
It was those type of hugs where our hearts understood unspoken words and our eyes gave comfort our physical touch couldn’t have matched. I’ve never had such an emotional and intense moment in my life with little to no words, yet a lot was being said.
A closer feeling is when I look into my lovers eyes and I want to collapse in his arms. Except this was different. It came with a sharp pain of heartache, heartbreak and whatever word could express the pain.
So, imagine how I felt when I got the call again yesterday. It’s barely 2 months from the death of my uncle, basically two days away and my mother had call to break another news. Except these times, the words were different.
She said, get over here; he’s gone. The rage, the hurt, anger, sadness and the pain, I could feel it all. I didn’t want to imagine what my mother was going through. I just knew it was unimaginable.
Aisha, get dressed, Alhaji is dead were the words I woke my sister with. Like lightening, she stood up and started preparing to have her bath.
I didn’t bother to think about it too much; this is so much loss than I ever witnessed in my entire life. The first dead human dead body I had seen was my uncles. Now, it was my grand father. My mother just lost her dad.
I remember the mint naira note he always handed us at family gatherings and during salah period. He had all the denominations of the Nigerian naira that he handed us based on our age.
As a kid, I and my play mates called him Alhaji 5 naira; that was what he gave me anyways.
On the rare occasion that I had called him on one of my holidays, he prayed so much that I borrowed 2 other phones till he could finish his prayers. I had since then graduated to 200 naira; the special child.
But I was all grown up now and I have a faint memory of when last I saw Alhaji.
The way my mother talks about him makes me sometimes wish he was my father.
“My father is a great man, ” he is the best father” amongst the so many other good things she said about him always. She loved him and always prayed for him. I can’t say that’s the case with my father but……It doesn’t matter.
The figure of Alhaji lying on the bed; this man was fine even in death. I covered his body with a white thobe (jubbah) since my aunt had gone to get a white shroud with a host of other items needed to clean up his body.
He was clean. His melanin was proper glowing and I was tempted to ask for a skin regimen but then it occurred to me. It’s noor (light) from the above.
His body was cleaned and while we get ready to finish up preparations before the burial, the most amazing thing happened. The inspiration for this post.
My mother handed me an envelope consisting a white shroud, very clean and neatly ironed, a sum of 20 thousand naira in another another envelope. Carefully packed with bold writings on it. What did he write?
This shroud is the one you’d clothe me in with my haram. I ironed this cloth today 13th December, 1999. By the grace of God, this is the cloth you should bury me in.
I, your father, Alhaji M.A.Badru.
Today is the day I repack this cloth; 3rd, April, 2007.
Proof in the picture below.
Money for the clerics . By Alhaji M.A.Badru
This 103 year old man had prepared his prayer money since 1999, that’s 26 years ago. It was written on the envelope but was later cancelled as he changed the date when he repacked the money as seen in the picture above.
Why did he repack? He updated the currency and amount as the Nigerian note changed. I’m still amazed as I don’t think I have ever been this intentional in my 23 years on earth. He had prepared for his own death 26 years earlier and even bought both his wives coffin and his years before my mother even got married.
Also on the envelope was the date he ironed his shroud and the details of who had seen his shroud and sent it.
See picture below.
8th, December, 1999.
Today is the day Alhaji Imam Babatunde Mumuni & Imam Opeloyeru sew my end time cloth for me. This cloth was sent to me by Mr Mustapha, Aminahs father.
Yours truly,
Alhaji Badiru.
Also, as picture proof below are the different naira denominations he had in the envelope.
At 103, the most meticulous man I ever known died a peaceful death on a friday; if you’re a Muslim reading this, you know what it means.
We headed for the burial ground and prayed again before finally lowering him into the grave. Friday, 23rd March 2018 was a different day in my life and it should be in yours too. Not because of my grand father but because we are too soaked in this worldly life that we don’t realize ours might be the next passing.
In the tiniest way possible, are you ready for your death? What preparations are you making? Are you intentional in your decisions?
Reflect and ask yourselves these questions. Are you ready for DEATH?
I know I hardly share personal information but this should be personal for all of us because death is real and it would come for us sooner or later. I pray it meets us in the best of conditions.
Writing is one of the art I know and with this I pay my last respect to my uncle and grand father. May Allah grant both of you jannah and save you from the torment of the grave.
Kindly say a prayer for them and also for the loved ones you’ve lost and the dead in general.
See you next post.
Meanwhile, previous post still lurking here.
Don’t forget to tune in to @wilsonsjuiceco tomorrow Sunday 25th as I take over their Insta stories taking you through my daily activity.
Thanks for reading always.
Soaked In Love!
❤❤❤
Meedah!
Tribute to my Uncle and Grand father.
Ink…..Dries….
94 comments
So sorry about your loss Hameedah, May Allah grant them both Aljannah Fridaus . Thank you for sharing these stories with us. It’s good you’ve written about it. Apart from paying last respects. These notes serve as a reminder and a journal. In years to come(in sha Allah), you’d look back at them and remember exactly how you felt about the events.
I lost my grandmum, in April, last year. I wrote and I’m still writing stories about her and her passing. I fear that I might forget what a wonderful person she was if I don’t. And that would be tragic.
Thank you again for the reminder about how temporary the life of this world is.
Yeah. It’s definitely a reminder. I’m so sorry about your grand mum. May Allah widen and lighten up and grave, save her from the torment of the grave and grant her the highest rank in jannah. You’re welcome. Thank you so much for reading and Ameen to your duas .
may Allah overlook their shortcomings and make the grave wide for them. may He give you the fortitude to get through this times and may He have mercy on us all. As scary as it looks, it’s the most bitter truth we all have no choice but to accept.
Ameen. Thank you so much for reading.
Subhannallah. May Allah or give his shortcomings and grant him Jannah. I know how death feels and I can only imagine how you and your family feels right now. May Allah give mommy and the rest of the family the fortitude to bear the loss. Death is indeed that visitor we all expect but are never ready for. May it visit us in the best of conditions.
Ina llilah wa Ina ilayhi rajiun.
Ameen. I can’t wish for anything better than a death in best decisions. Thank you for reading.
This was a very deep post. We are never ready for death. Two great losses.. Mdobwe really prepare for our death?
I pray Allah gives you ajd your family ease to move on. May Allah forgive their shortcomings and grant them jannah.
Ameen babe. He just made me think about my whole life.
May Al-jannatul firdaus be his final abode and may Allah grant d family the strength to move on. Death, kullu nafsin za’ikatul maut. And thanx for dis write up dear, it serves as a reminder. God bless you
Ameen. You’re welcome and God bless you too. Thanks for reading.
Inna lillahi wa inna ilaehi rajiun
May Almighty Allah grant him Al Jannah firdaous
May He be pleased with us all
Ameen. Thank You!
Innallillahi wahinnailayhi rojihun…… May Allah grant them AL-Janat Firdaus and save them from the torments of the grave…….
It’s 14 years today that I lost one of my grandpas too. I pray his soul continue to rest in perfect peace and Allah grant him AL-Janat Firdaus…… . May Allah grant your family the strength to get over it.. Take heart 💞
Ameen. Thank you Halimah. I’m sorry for about your grand father. May Allah grant him the highest rank in jannah.
Ina llilah wa ina Ilayhi rajiun. This worth emulating, May Allah forgive his sins and grant him Aljannah firdaus. I’m sure he was a great man.
Definitely worth emulating. Thank you so much Lekan. Ameen to the duas.
May Almighty Allah forgive his sins nd grant him aljanah fridous. Amin thuma amin
SO sorry about your loss Sis…. May Allah rest His soul! What a beautiful way to live and pass away…. I’m glad I read this!
May Almighty Allah grant him eternal rest
Ina lilah wa ina ilayhi raji’oon. He was such a good man, he was prepared for His death. SubhanAllah!! May Allah forgive all his shortcomings and grant him the highest rank in jannah. May Allah give the whole family the strength to bare this lost.
I’ve learnt so much from this,preparing for the afterlife from this dunya,may ALLAH grant him the highest ranks in jannah
Masha Allah many Allah bless them with Janna amin
SO sorry about your loss Sis…. May Allah rest their souls 🙏
What a beautiful way to live and pass away…. I’m glad I read this!
May Allah forgive his shortcomings, make him an inmate of Jannah and let the holy Qur’an light his grave and be his companion till the day of judgement. May Allah also forgive us the living and grant us steadfastness in the deen. Amin
Sorry about your loss. May the Almighty Allah grant them a space in heaven and your family, the fortitude to bear the loss. Salam.
Ameen. Thank you so much Khalid. Walaykum salam.
This post made my eyes water.
Alhamdulillah for the life he lived. May Allah grant him the highest rank in Jannah, forgive his sisns and protect him from the torment of the grave, ameen.
I pray for comfort for your entire family and may you not witness any more losses, ameen.
Ameen Zaynab. Thank you so much for the prayers.
I felt your pain and loss… He sounds like a wonderful person, May Almighty Allah forgive his sins and have mercy on him. May he grant him Al janah firdaus. Ina lilah wa Ina ilayhi radio on.
He definitely was a wonderful person. The best human I’ve ever known actually. Ameen to your prayers. Thank you.
Innallilahi Wainnaillahi Rajihun.
This is a very deep, real and emotional post. I felt my heartbeat racing and goosebumps all over my body.
The type of post that render you speechless with sweaty palms. May Allah forgive us all of our sins. Have mercy on our loved ones that have left. Guide us in this worldly and vain life. Ease away all our worries and aches. Shower His protection on us from the mishaps of this life.
I wish I could say more Hameedah; but my prayers are with you. Stay Strong for you have
to be for your mother. My greetings to her.
May the mercies of Allah be with you and your family. I Care!
Omg, you said so much prayers. Thank you so much for the kind words Sekinat. May Allah accept all our duas. Ameen. I really appreciate this and I’m sure mom would be so happy reading this too. Thank you.
Choi! The case of death is always different. Makes me remember the not so good things I’ve done. Makes me fear the ending end. Sincerely I couldn’t think more of anything now than to start preparing, as I try to control myself from shedding tears without crying in public. I AM INSPIRED. Your grandpa left in style. One anybody would wish for.
I want to thank you for sharing this great story with us, it is absolutely beneficial and rewarding. I pray Allah forgive his shortcomings, protect him from the torment of fire and grant him Aljana firdaus. And I pray that Allah grant you all the fortitude to bear the loss on both ends and preserve all that is left behind. Amin… My thoughts are with you.
Thank you so much Sharaf. All that I seek is that people benefit from this just like I have and I’m glad this was inspiring to you and gears you towards doing more good deeds. Ameen to your dua.
Thank You!
Innanillah waina ilai rajiun. May Allah forgive them of their sins. Widen their graves nd elevate them among the lucky ones on the day if reckoning. Amin.
Death is inevitable wollahi.
May Allah take us when He’s most pleased with us. Amin
Ameen. Thank you so much
Inalilah wa ina ilayhi rojiun, May Allah forgive their sins, Grant ur grandfather and uncle Jannah tul Fridaus. Aamin
Ameen. Thank you so much.
This was an insightful read; death is the ultimate unifier. It’s the debt everyone owes and must pay. The prayer is that we should be ready and prepared to meet our Maker.
May Allah illuminate his grave with noor and widen his grave. May his sins be forgiven and may Allah grant him jannah. Amin.
My condolences to your mom and her siblings.
Ameen. Thank you so much Fatimah.
Awwwn. I admire your Grandpa. Kí ìké àti ìgé máa báwon(english fails me here). Such a beautifully intentional man he was.
Reminds of my Grandma(Kí ìké àti ìgé máa báwon). She passed 2years ago and unfortunately I was in a faraway state at the time(still haunts me). She was home for me.
I remember she had prepared her shroud too. It was at the bottom corner of her wardrobe.
We had a tradition, whenever I returned from school to her house, I would rearrange her wardrobe while gisting. I would pick some vintage pieces of Aso-oke and some very unique fine fabrics that I liked. She would say “bí o bá tí le wòó, múu”
She’d never let me touch the bundle of white cloth. I sensed it was her shroud and wouldn’t argue. Now it’s clear that she was prepared too.
I miss her for so many reasons and I just got inspired to go write about her. Thank you.
May Allah continue to rest their souls.
Innalilahi waina ilahyi rajiun, may Allah grant them both Janah,well done sis
Ameen. Thanks dear
May Allah grant him Al-jannat firdaus and may he grant you the fortitude to bear the loss.
Ameen. Thank you so much for dropping by.
It’s an inspiring story of a very devout man in life and In death. May Allah grant him jannah Al firdaus.
Ameen. Thanks for dropping by.
I kind of got goose bumps fill me up throughout reading dis. I don’t have the right words to define your grandfather but Allah know best. So sori for the loss. May Allah reward him with Jannah Firdaus. May Allah be your entire relation’s guide to get through the loss.
Your words are just right on spot. Thank you so much. Ameen.
I apologize for feeling like I was reading a well written and crafted fiction post. That’s how breathtakingly amazing this piece is.
But I had to tell myself, No OmoTolani. It isn’t fiction. Somebody just died. Someone’s father and grandpa, and a totally awesome person he was. I got shaken all over, and silently muttered: Innalilah wainaillahi rajiun. From Allah we come and verily, surely, to Him we shall return.
I have experienced loss, and I still cannot write about it. Maybe someday , I will. Maybe I will be able to pen the emotions that rush through, when I remember Emeka’s death. Or my Grandpa’s. Or Ruqayyah’s. Or Olaide’s. Or the others, who I still remember like we spoke just last week. Maybe, just maybe I will.
I admire your wits and calm at doing this. May Allah be with the family and grant Alhaji the highest rank in Jannah. Amin
It’s absolutely fine. I’m so sorry for the loved ones you lost too. I pray that they are in the best of places. Ameen to your dua.
Thank you so much. I pray that one day, you are able to write about your lost loved ones.
From Him we come and to Him we return. Even though I don’t know your grandfather, this is so emotional for me. It takes a lot for a family to witness concurrent deaths. May Allah Grant your family the strength to bear the loss. May He Grant your grandfather AlJannah Firdaous. To think that he prepared for his own death so long ago. What an amazing person. May Allah Grant your family goodness and peace and long lives. Aameen
Ameen. He was really an exemplary father. Thank you so much Wazeerah.
Innalilahi Wainnaillahi Rajihun
May Allah grant them Al-janat Fridaus and give the whole family the strength to bare the lost.
This post is very deep and emotional. It got me thinking after.
Ameen. I’m glad this touches a spot in your heart. Thank you so much for dropping by.
I am speechless but I am so happy that I wish and pray for myself and loved ones that Allah makes it easy for us to have a wonderful end of time…. May Allah forgive all of his shortcomings, widen his grave and grant him the best of abode; Al-jannatul firdaus❤
Love you sister ❤
Just like it was for us. It was sad to lose him but in that sadness, it was a happy loss. Ameen.
Thank you sis .
May Allah reward them both with Jannah. Felt shivers & goosebumps reading through this post. It’s so amazing how well prepared your grandfather was for his death. He lived long & died on a Friday, Masha Allah. I pray you have the fortitude to bear both losses. Take heart dear.
Ameen. It was the most amazing thing I saw. Thank you so much sis. May Allah accept all our dua.
May Allah place him amongst the most righteous and make the grave peaceful for him and afterwards grant him Al-jannah
Ameen. Thank you so much Nafeesah.
May Allah grant both the departed Aljannatu Firdaus. This is indeed an eye opener for those who have ears and ruminate. What have we prepared for the morrow? Inna lillaahi wa inna ilayhi Raajihun. Accept my condolenses.
Ameen. Thank you so much.
Innalillahi waina illehi rajiun. Accept my deepest condolence on the death of ur beloved uncle and grandpa, may Allah grant them aljanat firdaus. Wallah! I ve never read anything more touching in all my 30+ years on earth, Alhaji may be gone but i have learnt alot from the way he lived his life(I pray almighty Allah adds that to his good deeds).
Wow. Ameen sis. Thank you so much for reading. I’m glad you found this helpful and inspiring.
Wow this brought tears to my eyes.
May Allah grant your Uncle and Grandpa jannah and save them from the torment of the grave. And may Allah comfort you and your entire family .
Ameen thuma Ameen. Thank you so much sis.
May Allah forgive their sins and grant them al Janah Firdaus
Mehn this post is deep …brought me close to tears as I read them and could relate so deeply with everyword
May Allah also easy mummy’s affairs and grant her the fortitude to bear her loss.
Ameen. Thank you so much sis. Means a whole lot.
This actually brought tears to my eyes. May Allah grant them both Al-jannah firdaus. Amin
Awwwn. Ameen. Thank you.
Innallillaah wa inna ilayhi Raj’oon Subhanallaah, he’s truly organised, he understands very well that every soul shall taste death and from his actions, it’s obvious that he’s prepared anytime. May Alaah grant him Jannah and forgive his shortcomings and other dead Muslims. A reminder for us all.
Ameen. Thanks for reading.
This just reminds you of how we’re all not here to stay. May Allah grant him the best place in Jannah and I pray that the rest of us here make good use of this dunya to seek Jannah.
Ameen baby. Thank you.
A gift it is to be conscious of death and a greater blessing it is to act upon that consciousness in terms of preparing for it, as it is inevitable. Preparing his shroud in ’99 is a great description of who he was and that’s my takeaway from this post. May Allah accept his return, grant him jannah, and make us die as serious Muslims.
Yeah..couldn’t have said it better. Thank you so much. Ameen.
Innalillah waina ilehi rajihoon, May Allah forgive his shortcomings and grant him Al Jannah. Death is inevitable, yet, we all keep running around trying to live, preparing and planning for the next day like we were promised. This post is a wake up call to us all, May we not die till Allah is pleased with us (Ameen)
Very right. Ameen to your duas
Innalillahi wa inna ilaihi rajiun. He was so organized. May jannatul firdaus be his new home. Amin.
Yes he was. Thank you so much for the prayer. Ameen.
Inna lillahi wahina ilahi rajihoon.
Sighs deeply, I pray Allah swt forgive them of their sins and transgressions, save them from the punishment of Qabri (the grave), and grant them a place in jannah. Amin
Hard luck sister. Allah knows best.
Ameen. Thank you so much for the dua.
Truly, death is inevitable. From Allaah we come and to Him is our return. May Almighty Allaahh grant the family the fortitude to bewr the loss. May He forgive his shortcomings, grant him Jannah. Accept my condolences.
Ameen. Thank you so much ❤
Innalilahi wainailahi rajihun.. May their gentle soul rest in perfect peace. Your words were very inspirational, May Almighty Allah led is to the right part and guide our steps. May Allah give the strenght to bear the loss of the dead and may Allah make jannah their final abode.
Ameen. Thank you so much ❤
This was very deep, May his gentle soul rest in peace. This article reminds me of my father’ death too, May his soul also rest in peace. Maa Salam. Thank care!
Ameen. I wish thesame for your father too. Thanks for dropping by the blog.
I;m completely stunned at the amount of preparation that this man did. Wow! I’m definitely not ready for death – I have to get my life right first before I can be taken away. I can only hope I live long enough to fulfil the purpose for which I was created.
I’m still in awe of him and I will never not. I also pray you live to serve your purpose. Definitely not ready for death as well, using everyday as a tool to be better. Thanks for reading Amaka.
Subhanallah, this is me deciding to be even more intentional than I already am. You’ve got a great art!
May Allah grant them his noor till and on the day of reckoning
Awwn, thanks for the kind words. Ameen ya rabb. May Allah strengthen you.
This is a very sensitive and insightful post, tho it’s more than a year ago, I’ll try to tread carefully.
I never witnessed the power of death or how realistic it can be until I lost my dad in 2016 so i kinda know how you feel. Since then, I’ve been living life to the fullest, trying to achieve more everyday and not letting setbacks weigh me down.
Hopefully, we gain strength from things originally designed to pull us down.